The Hidden Controller
What I don’t know about myself controls my life. This profound statement from the Core Values framework captures a truth that most of us sense but rarely examine. Our unconscious patterns—the beliefs, reactions, and strategies we adopted long ago—continue to operate beneath our awareness, shaping our decisions in ways we don’t understand.
If I don’t know who I am at the unchanging inner level, I cannot fully comprehend how I operate, how I think, what motivates me, what kind of work causes me to be fully engaged, what my highest and best contribution must be.
The Foundation of Leadership and Performance
Self-knowledge is the cornerstone on which leadership, top performance, and high contribution are built. If I do not know and understand the ineffective ways I handle the variety of people and situations in my life, if I am not willing to change the attitudes and ideas and beliefs that motivate these ineffective behaviors, I cannot grow into my full potential.
If I am not aware of the beliefs and ideas which I keep locked away—supposedly out of sight—I am controlled by these things. I will find myself responding to a boss or a peer or an employee (or spouse or child) just like I used to respond to my father or mother or sibling.
Living in an Unconscious State
All of us live to some degree in this unconscious state, unaware of the stimulus and response (knee-jerk) patterns of our lives. The power of any leader derives directly from knowledge of these patterns and a willingness to become ever more conscious of them.
To the degree that I know myself and remain conscious of the beliefs and attitudes that control my behavior patterns, I am in control of my own life. I am psychologically and spiritually awake. I am able to make conscious choices. I can ask myself “What is the most effective response?” rather than simply react out of old personality scripts or comfortable patterns.
What the CVI Reveals
The Core Values Index reveals aspects of your inner nature that you may have never consciously understood:
- Your primary motivation: What truly drives you—Power, Love, Wisdom, or Knowledge—and why you make the choices you do.
- Your stress patterns: How you typically react when threatened and why certain situations trigger you.
- Your contribution style: The unique way you add value to teams and organizations.
- Your blind spots: What you naturally overlook or undervalue because it’s not part of your core nature.
- Your learning style: How you best absorb and process new information.
The Builder’s Blind Spots
Builders may not realize how their drive for action can intimidate others or prevent careful consideration. They may not see that their impatience, which feels like efficiency to them, creates anxiety in those around them. Their faith in their own power can blind them to the value of others’ contributions.
The Merchant’s Blind Spots
Merchants may not recognize how their desire for connection can slide into people-pleasing or manipulation. They may not see that their optimistic future-focus can seem unrealistic to others. Their need for appreciation can make them avoid necessary conflicts that would ultimately strengthen relationships.
The Innovator’s Blind Spots
Innovators may not realize how their thoughtful pauses can frustrate action-oriented colleagues. They may not see that their analytical approach can seem cold or dismissive. Their confidence in their own wisdom can prevent them from truly hearing others’ perspectives.
The Banker’s Blind Spots
Bankers may not recognize how their need for thoroughness can delay necessary action. They may not see that their commitment to proper procedure can seem like inflexibility or obstruction. Their focus on accuracy can make them seem critical of others’ more intuitive approaches.
From Unconscious Reaction to Conscious Choice
When we experience ourselves being overpowered by someone, or unloved, or unappreciated, or judged as being wrong, we feel fearful. We get a tight knot in our stomachs. A voice in our head tells us to take defensive action and we react, shifting out of our positive self and into the negative conflict strategies of our core values.
Self-knowledge interrupts this automatic process. When you understand your core values, you can recognize the early signs of defensive activation. You can pause between stimulus and response. You can choose a more effective approach rather than defaulting to unconscious patterns.
The Path to Freedom
The secret is to give up the idea of changing yourself and take possession of your life. Claim the powerful, loving, creative, and knowledgeable elements of your life and build on them. Instead of trying to change who you are habitually being, the challenge is to find your way back to being who you really are.
Each core value without fear has a wonderful capable strategy for developing fulfillment and success in life. The idea is to reclaim your life from the rules and expectations of parents, teachers, and early social influences to see yourself as the wisdom, power, love, or knowledge in the room that you are—and to develop all of the positive aspects of your Core Values Strategies, minimizing your negative reactions.
Beginning the Journey of Self-Knowledge
The first step toward freedom from unconscious control is awareness. The Core Values Index provides a mirror that reflects your inner nature clearly—not who you’ve been told to be, not who you think you should be, but who you actually are at the deepest level.
With this knowledge, you can begin to distinguish between conscious choices and automatic reactions. You can understand why certain situations trigger you and develop more effective responses. You can align your work and relationships with your true nature rather than fighting against yourself.
Discover What You Don’t Know
The Core Values Index reveals the hidden patterns that may be controlling your life. Take the assessment and receive your comprehensive 17-page report with insights into your inner nature, stress patterns, and path to greater freedom.